The August sky was full of shooting stars as the meteor shower reached its peak. It was the summer before my senior year of college and I was working at a camp. A group of us had hauled mattresses and sleeping bags up to the top of a hill to sleep in a graveled clearing where we had a great view of the stars. I drifted off to sleep around 1:30 but was rudely awakened by my friend's urgent whisper, "Guys...there's a SKUNK!"
At first I thought it was a practical joke, but as my senses awakened one by one, my nose began to smell that pervasive skunky odor. By the time I slowly sat up and looked around, the skunk had wandered off into the underbrush. Someone had seen it rub against some of our bedding, so we sat vigilantly guarding our stuff for a while. Nothing happened. After a while my heart stopped pounding and I was able to lay back down. My groggy mind slowly developed a defense plan. I scrunched down, almost completely submerging myself in my sleeping bag. But I left one arm out, with a hand tucked underneath the mattress so that at the slightest spray, I could flip upside down, pulling the mattress on top of me to shield me from the toxic skunkations. Someone heard rustling in the bushes and I tensed up, preparing to fling the mattress over my head in one swift motion. Nothing happened.
You know how your mind kind of wanders when you're half-asleep, so that you see things played out in your mind as you think about them? Well, in my sleepy state I saw myself sprayed by this horrible beast. I imagined myself returning back to school in 3 weeks and sitting in the back of the classroom with empty seats all around me, people sitting up front trying not to gag from the stench. No one would be able to conentrate when I was nearby. My classmates would despise me. How could this happen to me now? How would I be able to live a normal life when I radiated skunk?! My imagination found the connection to my vocal chords and suddenly my friends were awakened by my frantic shriek, "I'M TOO YOUNG TO BE SKUNKED!"
It's funny how I always seem to think that bad things shouldn't happen to me. When everything goes great in life, that's normal. Of course. That's what I expect. But when problems come, suddenly I'm wailing and lamenting and wondering, "why is this happening to me? I shouldn't have to deal with this!" Or worse, I begin to question God's goodness.
Recently my cousins' families were struck with some pretty hard blows. Two babies were lost during pregnancy, and one four year old boy* was diagnosed with leukemia. I've been so impressed by my cousins' reactions to these tragedies. They've chosen to echo the words of Job, "The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." My cousins' response was not to accuse God of being injust, but rather to trust in his good and loving plan for their lives and the lives of their children. And their response made me think.
Why is it that I'm so quick to argue with God? No Lord, I'm too young to be skunked. It's so clear in the Bible that God uses adversity to strengthen us, to build our character, to infuse us with hope. When I look back on my life I see that the times I grew the most were hard times. So why do I make plans to avoid adversity at all costs? I'm running through life with one hand tucked under the mattress, ready to reatreat at the first sign of trouble. But that's not a biblical response to suffering. If I trust in God's goodness and power, and truly believe that his plan for my life is for the best, then I should welcome hardships as an opportunity to grow and become more like Jesus. Just as God took the ugliness of a torturous cross and turned it into something beautiful when Jesus love was demonstrated upon it, so God can take the ugliness of our weakness and suffering and make them beautiful when his strength and beauty shine through them.
So, I've been praying that God would help me to receive adversity joyfully, when it comes. (No rush, though, Lord!) I'm confident that God will only give me what I can handle, and that it will be for my best. At least that's how I feel today. But just wait 'till the next skunk wanders into camp.
At first I thought it was a practical joke, but as my senses awakened one by one, my nose began to smell that pervasive skunky odor. By the time I slowly sat up and looked around, the skunk had wandered off into the underbrush. Someone had seen it rub against some of our bedding, so we sat vigilantly guarding our stuff for a while. Nothing happened. After a while my heart stopped pounding and I was able to lay back down. My groggy mind slowly developed a defense plan. I scrunched down, almost completely submerging myself in my sleeping bag. But I left one arm out, with a hand tucked underneath the mattress so that at the slightest spray, I could flip upside down, pulling the mattress on top of me to shield me from the toxic skunkations. Someone heard rustling in the bushes and I tensed up, preparing to fling the mattress over my head in one swift motion. Nothing happened.
You know how your mind kind of wanders when you're half-asleep, so that you see things played out in your mind as you think about them? Well, in my sleepy state I saw myself sprayed by this horrible beast. I imagined myself returning back to school in 3 weeks and sitting in the back of the classroom with empty seats all around me, people sitting up front trying not to gag from the stench. No one would be able to conentrate when I was nearby. My classmates would despise me. How could this happen to me now? How would I be able to live a normal life when I radiated skunk?! My imagination found the connection to my vocal chords and suddenly my friends were awakened by my frantic shriek, "I'M TOO YOUNG TO BE SKUNKED!"
It's funny how I always seem to think that bad things shouldn't happen to me. When everything goes great in life, that's normal. Of course. That's what I expect. But when problems come, suddenly I'm wailing and lamenting and wondering, "why is this happening to me? I shouldn't have to deal with this!" Or worse, I begin to question God's goodness.
Recently my cousins' families were struck with some pretty hard blows. Two babies were lost during pregnancy, and one four year old boy* was diagnosed with leukemia. I've been so impressed by my cousins' reactions to these tragedies. They've chosen to echo the words of Job, "The Lord gives and the Lord takes away. Blessed be the name of the Lord." My cousins' response was not to accuse God of being injust, but rather to trust in his good and loving plan for their lives and the lives of their children. And their response made me think.
Why is it that I'm so quick to argue with God? No Lord, I'm too young to be skunked. It's so clear in the Bible that God uses adversity to strengthen us, to build our character, to infuse us with hope. When I look back on my life I see that the times I grew the most were hard times. So why do I make plans to avoid adversity at all costs? I'm running through life with one hand tucked under the mattress, ready to reatreat at the first sign of trouble. But that's not a biblical response to suffering. If I trust in God's goodness and power, and truly believe that his plan for my life is for the best, then I should welcome hardships as an opportunity to grow and become more like Jesus. Just as God took the ugliness of a torturous cross and turned it into something beautiful when Jesus love was demonstrated upon it, so God can take the ugliness of our weakness and suffering and make them beautiful when his strength and beauty shine through them.
So, I've been praying that God would help me to receive adversity joyfully, when it comes. (No rush, though, Lord!) I'm confident that God will only give me what I can handle, and that it will be for my best. At least that's how I feel today. But just wait 'till the next skunk wanders into camp.
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*If you want to know how you can pray for my cousin's son, Connor, check out his website at http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/connorratzlaff.
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